...Wow, how long have I been asleep for?

I feel like I've been on another planet for a while...I really haven't thought of anything brilliant to say lately...Partly due to exhaustion, disillusionment and all over depression. Not the kind of depression that causes people to wind up in the hospital and have to take prescription medicine. No my depression is caused by a lot of the things that I continue to learn about this life. Life is still what I make it, but I thought there was more mystery to this world than I thought. Which causes me to feel disillusioned with what I've come to learn. Is there any real hope? No, I didn't think so.

So we've been sold into a fantasy to make up for the fact of the matter that humanity is just a fluke, and we've damaged the earth with pollution and been forced to call it problems with CO2 emissions. It's all those wonderful corporate labels that make the illusion that a warmer day than the norm is called "Global Warming" and we should all be concerned....Seriously, we haven't a clue really to know what this world is capable of. We're just along for the ride! It seems at every turn there are people trying to benefit off of others gullibility by telling what they believe should be heard, but what is not necessarily the truth. We are a generation lost by deception and lies. Like the movie "The Matrix" we've been fed a lie to mask the obvious and sad truth that people want to be fooled.

I am also disillusioned with the way the elderly are being treated today. Some seem to be left for dead in nursing homes and tucked away like an old photograph! The ones who have family who care for them are probably the most lucky ones. I spent seven months working for a retirement residence hoping that maybe it would be some solace but when I think of all the problems that get masked or ignored until too late it just burns me up inside. I wanted to see if the future would hold more options, but as I told Mom, the "golden years" are the ones you reflect on now, the ones you make. The future holds no certainties that is for sure. I saw so many people die there. Most of them are thinking that they're going to leave there one day and return home. I wish it was that easy, but nothing is certain but death and taxes.

The almighty dollar, that's what it comes to, it's that one coin, that one slip of paper that makes all the difference in the world. Something I'll keep striving for so that I may achieve a little more security in my life. I'm unemployed right now, and unemployment is not that exciting. I wish I could make it without the money, but I can't. Frank can't do it himself and I'm obligated to keep our household stable. Thankfully I haven't missed paying any bills and am only a few thousand in debt. It's all good...I'll keep lying to myself until I can be in the black again. Maybe one day...